Many blogs post about the most romantic gifts to give on Valentines day; many do all red gift guides as if red items mean ‘true’ love. Saving up the romance and giving your most romantic gift on the arbitrary date of February 14th is for amateurs (like getting drunk on holidays).

If you have made it with me for that long winded preamble then you shall be rewarded – an all black gift guide featuring great gifts not for your wife or husband or same sex partner but for yourself. Love lies in your on hand (or in your pocket book as this list suggests). So pour yourself a drink, light some candles, get Naked and read a good book and have your own best Valentines Day/Night.

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Comme des Garcons Play Black Heart Cardigan. The name explains itself. $472


Valentino Studded Bracelet (S/M for the boring fashion set) $295


Because you can’t make friends with Salad but you can with Scotch $155

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Why not marry yourself 4x over? Maison Martin Margiela knuckle rings (set of 4) Bonus: 4 rings make you look pretty bad ass.

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No one does romantic black better than Alexander McQueen. $595

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Music of the heart. Marshall Hanwell Limited Edition Speaker. $600

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Because drunken make outs on VDay in a bar with a stranger is the stuff of legends (or at least a bad angst ridden novel) . Make sure you taste good.  Black Tooth Brush $8, Cinnamon Toothpaste $12

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Who’s a dirty pig boy? Harry Allen Piggy Bank $125 available 02/14/14 (perfection)

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You always wear Tom Ford for yourself not others. $240


Helmut Newton: Sumo – a must have for your home library. Without Helmut, scantily clad men would have never worn heels. $100

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Naked Trunks. Super comfy and seamless, because you should always feel naked. Or so their slogan says? $32 Made in Canada


Philip Roth‘s masterpiece on sex, scandal, ecstasy of sanctimony, race and political correctness. A must for every man.


Nothing is sexier than jazz, even in it’s melancholy. Nina Simone is one of my favourite and I chose this one because Black is The Color of My True Love’s Hair. Nina Simone, Black Gold $46

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Light some candles, drink some wine and listen to Nina on your VDay; nothing is sexier than this  Italian Leather by Nest, $32, because even I am tired of paying Diptyque prices.

Addendum: I was asked by a friend to add my chocolate choice. Who knew so many people want chocolates for Valentines? I’d much rather have any of my above choices (hint hint). But if you must, here is my choice.


Soma The Starry Night: Dark Chocolate with Maldon Salt. I love their balance of sweet, salty and bitter – just like the perfect companion.

SHOWHIDE Comment (1)

Christian has been a cultural and style junkie since the age of 6; while most kids were swiping cookies, he was swiping his grandfathers' Patek Philippe. Raised to appreciate art, fashion,design and  literature (yeah, this one actually reads) by a single mother fondly called Jackie-O. Christian quickly went from childhood cultural capital thief to academia protégé. Referred to as the cat's meow by some, too clever by half by others, Christian eschewed the academic life and ran away to join the circus -the fashion circus. Several well-appointed positions later and a career on the rise would be most people's dream but it was time to say fuck off and start all over again.

This is Christian Dare Unedited.